When, Where and How to Refold a Flag

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• My mother recently received a folded burial flag in honor of my father, an Army veteran. It was folded with great precision and care before being presented to her. She purchased a wooden case to display it, but noticed the stars were not aligned. My brother and cousin decided to unfold and refold the flag to straighten the stars. Despite myself and other family members pointing out that online images showed the stars are not supposed to be perfectly straight, they insisted otherwise and proceeded. I was horrified that just two days after this tribute to my father, they would tamper with the flag without researching the significance of each precise fold. Am I wrong to feel this way? Should we return the flag to the Veteran's cemetery to have it properly refolded with the same care and respect? I feel like the flag has lost its intended special meaning.

  • Denise,

    I am so sorry this happened. Sometimes we can do things with the best of intentions that actually end up as quite offensive. There are two ways family members view the interment flag:

    1. Once folded by the pallbearers and received by the primary next-of-kin (NOK)*, the flag should never be unfolded. It would be a great offense to do so and very inappropriate. For many, the the folds hold great, significant meaning.

    2. Once folded by the pallbearers and received by the NOK, the flag is the possession of that individual. He or she can do with it what they would like. Some unfold the flag every year on the date of the loved one's death and fly it from the family flagpole and fold it up to fly next year.

    *The primary NOK goes in precedence: first is the spouse or parent, then the eldest child, and the next eldest child, etc. This person owns the flag and has or should have complete control of how it is displayed or used.

    The folded flag's stars are not supposed to be horizontal with the bottom (long) edge of the flag as it is a natural occurrence to have the stars at a slight angle. However, if that is how the NOK wants to display the flag, in a case with horizontal stars, that's OK since it is up to the NOK.

    You are not wrong for how you feel. I very much appreciate how you feel and support it. I also support families who fly their interment flag. What I do not support is family members not discussing a significant event and taking charge where they had no business to take charge.

    The cemetery staff might be able to refold the flag. I suggest that you contact your local police of fire department and see if they have honor guard members who can help you with this. Lastly, a local veteran's group might have a couple of members to help refold.

    In any event, may I suggest that you watch this video of me explaining how to properly fold a flag and possibly share it with those who will refold it. Two-Man Flag Fold Detailed Techniques. It open in a new tab.

    I'm also sending this to you in the email provided.

    John

    • Thank you so much for your quick response. I appreciate your input for both sides and the information you provided.

      Sincerely,

      Denise

• I have had my dads burial flag for 30 years and it has become unfolded and required and probably needs a cleaning.i would like someone to point me in the right direction.tell me who or where to send it I live in a retirement home and can’t get around like I use to .i served in combat in Vietnam and know what the flag means please help ,,, Robert v Johnson jr. use my phone number or text me. 312. 937. 2990

  • Mr. Johnson,

    Many thanks to you and your late father.

    If you want to clean the flag, the best way is to soak it in water with soap only, no chemicals at all.

    If you do not have the ability to properly clean the flag and refold it, you can sent it to Colonial Flag and they will take care of it for you and return it to you cleaned, pressed, and properly folded.

    Colonial Flag
    9390 South 300 West
    Sandy, Utah 84070

• My grandfather was killed in a plane crash in May, 1972 while in the service of the Tennessee Air National Guard. While his flag was folded correctly upon presentation to my grandmother, over the years the tuck has started to slip and the rest of the fold has begun to loosen. It would make my grandmother very happy if it could be refolded. Who can we contact to get this taken care of?

  • Hello sir,

    I can well imagine how a refolded flag would brighten your grandmother's day.

    If you and a family member are willing, you can do it. I made this video to help others understand the details. https://youtu.be/8BoXg1BCarI. I think this might be more meaningful.

    If not, then I suggest contacting your local police department or sheriff's office to see if they have an honor guard and, if so, have two members refold the flag. You could take it to the department/office and have them do it.

    Next, you could ask the fire department, local veteran's group, and even a high school JROTC.

    I hope you can get this accomplished.

    DM

    • Thank you!

• My husband, a deceased Marine, knew exactly how to fold a flag. He would often comment on how a flag was being improperly folded. At his ceremony I could see from the start it was being improperly folded. Every time I look at it I feel he was disrespected. It makes me angry as nothing was done to respect Vietnam Veterans and it continues. I need to have it refolded by Marines please

  • Ma'am,

    I will send you an email and see what we can do to get your husband's flag refolded.

    DM

• On the topic of presenting folded flags, I have participated in two recent LODDs where there were additional flags presented to various family members, in addition to the casket flag which was folded and presented first.

  I noted that there is an accommodation for such situations mentioned in the Army Drill & Ceremonies Manual (TC 3-21.5, Ch. 14, at the very end of Section II), and understand from previous posts that there is only one flag to be folded at a funeral, with the others to be folded ahead of time, but presented after the initial flag is folded and given to family.

  I was curious if there is any additional guidance or custom for how many flags could/should be presented, outside of the wishes of the family? One of the recent LODDs had the Honor Guard presenting flags to the widow, all adult children & all grandchildren present. If that is the family's wishes, I know we are happy to accommodate, but is there guidance we should be offering when we reach that point of discussion, during the planning portion?

  • Sir,

    This is a great question. The US government supplies one flag for the NOK and if the family chooses to have more presented, they must pay for those flags.
    One veteran, one flag should suffice, especially after I've seen many, many interment flags in thrift stores. Many family members don't know what to do with the one flag that was folded and presented for uncle Joe who served in WWII, handing out more flags like candy reduces the specialness of the flag and increases the likelihood of the flag(s) ending up in being given away since they no longer hold any meaning.
    I suggest that honor guards seriously consider adding this to the information provided for the family and I encourage families to hold that one special flag in high regard.

    DM

• Have you ever known of a flag being recorded 3 times? It was at a well attended military funeral. The family accepted the explanation from the Army that the flag was not sewed right, misshapen. Myself a veteran and other veterans viewing knew everytime that the detail was not tightening, smoothing edges and keeping the material taunt.
  I also saw shells tucked in. I know it’s been 30 years since I folded the flag as a member of a detail, but we were strictly told to not put the shells in the flag but to hand them to the family afterwards.
  To me, it would have been less embarrassing to the detail and confusing to onlookers if the flag had been refolded afterwards. Especially with a tv crew there and large crowd since it was a Korean War hero.
  What do you think.

  • Ms. Cates,

    Thank you for the note. Three times to refold? It sounds as if the flag folding team needs a great deal more training and practice. That's unacceptable to refold in front of the family. You fold it and hand it to the family, regardless of how poor a job you did. After the service, you approach the family and request to refold it out of sight.
    Aa for the shells, the Flag Code specifically states that the flag is not a receptacle. Nothing is placed in or on a flag. You are correct, the shells are handed to the family, separate from the flag.

• My grandfather, a World War Two veteran recently passed away, and the flag is poorly folded you can see the white and red on the corners. Is there anyone that I could contact who could refold it for my family properly? Maybe a local VFW post?

  • Hello Julie,

    Thank you for contacting me. I'm sorry for your loss. My thanks to your grandfather and his family for their sacrifices.

    My suggestion is to find a local high school JROTC unit or see if the local police or fire department has an honor guard. Anyone in these organizations will want to help you and make things right for you and your family.

• Thank you very much. I recently received a burial flag from my husbands funeral. The flag was poorly folded, and I've been wanting to have it refolded. I've decided to allow the JROTC at Houston County High School, in Warner Robins, GA (where I work) to do the refolding. The commander has enthusiastically agreed, and I'm sure she has information. However, I found a good website, sponsored by the American Legion, that shows how to fold the flag and explains the meaning of each fold. I thought it might make a good precursor to the actual folding.

  • Hello Lisa,

    I'm very sorry for your loss. Having JROTC cadets refold is a great way to educate everyone involved and provide a better memory for you.

    Officially, the folds have no meaning whatsoever, meaning was given to each fold during WWII. That meaning was used, unofficially, for 60+ years, but has been generally discontinued.

    You may want to have the cadets view my video of how to fold the American flag entitled, Two-man Flag Fold Detailed Techniques, at my YouTube channel, John DrillMaster Marshall.

    Please let me know if I can be of assistance.

    • Thank you for this information. My father was buried with an Honor Guard and while the ceremony was quite moving, the flag is not properly folded. The stars are crooked and being a former military member myself, this has really bothered me since the funeral. I may approach our local ROTC division and ask them if they will honor my father by refolding the flag if they can do it properly.

      • Mr. Edwards,

        It's my pleasure. I hope the flag can be refolded to your satisfaction.